Friday, September 28, 2007

Cheese Ball Jizz

Now, I'm not a champion homemaker by anyone's standards, but I do appreciate a good cheese ball. It's one of my signature dishes. Watching two kick ass homemakers - Amy Sedaris & Martha Stewart duke it out over which is better - smoked gouda or cheddar? "bong water" or chutney? - caused me to bubble over with jizz this morning! Although, is it wrong that I still think my cheese ball is better??

(Thanks to Four Four for bringing the video to my attention!)

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Jizz in my Eye!

I can see clearly now & the glasses are gone! It's like I traded in my eyeballs for the newer model! I am currently singing "A Whole New World" from the Disney hit film, Aladdin. Only in this case, it's a Whole New JIZZ!

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

foo jizz

so i know this record comes out today and the foo fighters are getting more than enough press and don't need help from the lil' old jizz blog, but dave grohl is soooo cuute. seriously! who's with me? one time i was at this secret weezer show and he was hanging out with all of us and ever since then i've just been swooning over him, no matter how many mediocre modern rock hits he puts out into the world. no 4 play. stick it in.

Monday, September 24, 2007

Fall Mall Jizz

My favorite Mall warrior, Kate T, and I hit the Streets of Southpoint on Saturday bright and early to jizz up our looks for fall!

First, we visited the Clinique counter at Nordstrom. An adorable teenager applied shine and shimmer to my eyes, and then Kate T let me practice scary eyeliner on hers.

Next up, jean shopping at Macy's. Apparently, the commercials didn't lie, Macy's really is a magical jizz factory! The very first pair of jeans I tried on fit perfectly!

After that, we tackled Nordstrom's dress up section to find a spectacular jizz-inducing dress for Kate T to wear to an upcoming wedding. Denise, our "plus-size" administer of jizz, kept us in stitches as she described stealing men from those "skinny LA women" by cooking their men a meal or even just "popping a can of Hungry Jack biscuits."

Thursday, September 20, 2007

jizzy water!

mmmm.. love me some fizzy water! when your stomach's feeling a little queasy or when you just want something a little tastier than filtered water, sparkling water with lime is kind of the best thing ever invented.

in the office we're fans of poland springs, but the lemon flavor kind of tastes like fruit loops. la croix lime is my pick. too bad it's more expensive than diet coke.

Sunday, September 16, 2007

new hockey season!

this little movie basically sums up how awesome the 'canes are.



Thursday, September 13, 2007

jizz scarf

Mighty Goods has a bacon scarf for sale.

I'm too poor to buy this, but you know it's going on my christmas wishlist. do i have any internet stalkers out there? now taking donations for all things bacon-jizz.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Po Boy Jizz

The Villager Cafe in Maurice, LA is the home of the best Shrimp Po Boy and bowl of french fries I have ever had. Bread that is crunchy on the outside, but soft on the inside overstuffed with light & crisp Gulf shrimp. Chopped up potatoes fried and put in a big bowl! My jizz groans filled the tiny dining room and I washed the whole meal down with a bottled diet coke.

If you go to Maurice for a po boy jizz, stop in next door and get a stuffed chicken or seasoned brisket from Jo Ann at Hebert's Specialty Meats. Your kitchen will overflow with a taste jizzplosion!