Thursday, October 19, 2006

Jumbo Honey Bun

Oh morning jizz! Feeling a little peckish and in need of a sugar jolt, the jumbo honey bun is for you! Double the jizz of a normal honey bun. I recommend a big gulp of Diet Coke or a Jumbo cup of coffee as a way to wash all that tasty jizz down!

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wordnerdy said...

Oohh . . . the vending machine upstairs totally has these! But I already drank my diet coke! NOOOOOOOO!!!!

Sociologian said...

Michael Pollard
Department of Sociology
Duke University
Box 90088
Durham, NC 27708-0088

April 28, 2001

Mrs. Smith’s Bakeries, Inc.
Spartanburg, SC 29303

To Whom It May Concern:

Please find enclosed the unused portion of one of your “Mrs. Freshley’s Jumbo Honey Buns” purchased from a vending machine on the Duke University Campus. I am a researcher on campus, and regularly enjoy one of your honey buns in the morning along with my coffee. The enclosed bun, however, has a very unpleasant lingering fishy chemical flavor, as though there was some sort of reaction between the plastic wrapper and the sugary coating, and thus I am returning it to you for your examination. In all other respects the bun is normal; the texture and moistness do not seem out of the ordinary. As much as I usually enjoy your product, I am unable to eat this particular bun, although the “Sell By” date (MAY 08) indicates it should still be edible. For your reference, additional markings on the wrapper include “9C7” (lot number?).

Thank you for your attention to this matter,

Michael Pollard

(They sent me a letter of appology and a coupon for a free frozen Mrs. Smith's pie)